Sometimes I am just in awe, 4 days down, ready as I can be


Last weekend was my wedding Anniversary, but I think I left something out about my wife. This change seems to be helping. And I am as ready for the weekend as I can be.

Sometimes Kim just leaves me in awe. I know it is a personality thing, and it is just the way it is, but man I wish I could bottle up some of what drives her. I am talking about her ability to just flip a switch and get stuff done. I mean, if I wake up and start working on things I can get some things done. And if it is important I can throw myself into a project. But Kim can just go from 0 to 60, and then get amazing amounts of work done.

Wednesday night she was dead tired, did a few things to get the house ready for the weekend, but still just crashed after dinner. But yesterday she hit the house like a hurricane, and had floors swept, mopped and vacuumed, with the kitchen fully cleaned before I even got home. And then we just kept right on going when I got home in packing the cars for the weekend. And this is not the first time, she is like this at work, and other times. It just leaves me in awe, the way she can just throw herself into things and get them done, just leaves me in the dust.

Working on Day 5 now with no caffeine. And it does seem to be making a difference. I am not as irritable at home in the evenings. Or at work. And I seem to be sleeping a little better. It is only a start, this weekend will be a good test. And then a regular, full week next week. But I think this is a change I really need to make and am committed to.

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This weekend is the Cub Scout pack family camp out. This is not one of my favorite events of the year to be honest. Spending a weekend with a bunch of kids, and parents I don’t know very well is not my idea of a good time. But I will be there for my kids, Danny & Emily, and to lighten the load for Kim. But this year I have slightly different agenda, I will intentionally try to find some time each day/evening to get away for myself. It is one of those things that stems from my childhood. Being raised by introverts who liked to camp, my idea of camping was hike to a spot, then everyone scatter to spend some time alone. So I will try to honor that background some this weekend.

Like I said, this weekend is a test, of my mental health, my living without caffeine. But I know that going in, and I have myself mentally ready for it. And I will have Kim to keep me pointed in the right direction, and give orders when needed, and most importantly she seems to understand me a little better now, and respect my need to get away from time to time.

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