Yes, I am trying to ignore everyone


(My oh my, 2 posts in a day! But this epiphany was too good to wait)

Got my new iPhone 2 weeks ago (6, with Gold back, it is sweet.) And with it came a set of the new headphones, that can also double as wireless headset. This week, what with returning to work, I made a point of bringing the headphones to use while driving. Then it occurred to me while I was eating lunch: hey I have headphones, why not listen to music while I eat? That was nice, because I was able to focus on my book, and not get distracted by other folks.

Today I was doing that when it occurred to me that I was just using this as a defense for my introversion. It is often enough to just sit and read while eating, but sometimes the world gets to be too much, and it is easier to just plug in the music as well.

The more I thought about this the more I realized that is what most of my music is. I keep music going pretty much all day, at work, and at home if possible. When I am at home and working on stuff and the kids are watching TV I have started putting on the headphones. And while I enjoy what I listen to, and keep it varied, and often at a relatively low volume (especially at work) I had the epiphany that the music is as much about isolating myself.

When I was young, middle school age, my mother and I went at it over my wanting a good set of headphones (it was a different world.) She didn’t want them because it reminded her of my father (being the introvert that he was) who would apparently often put on headphones and shutdown. Obviously technology has changed, as have people. It is far easier to have that portable musical shield going now. And yes, there are some who might think it is unhealthy for me to keep that shield up.

But, realize this people who get upset about that shield, we introverts are not trying to hurt you with that shield, we are trying to protect ourselves. It can be difficult, and even physically tiring to have constant interaction. And so we use what tools we have to cut down on that. It is a defense. But trust me, we do this the same way people wear coats in winter to protect them from the cold. Or exercise to keep healthy. It is for our own sanity and health. And, speaking for me, I am not wholly cut off from the world when I wear the headphones, I do try to be aware, it is just easier to keep that aural jacket on.

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